Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Aerobics For Your Brain

Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles.
And as we grow older, it's important that we keep mentally alert.
The saying "If you don't use it, you will lose it" also applies to the brain,
so below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence.
So, take the following test and determine if you are losing it or are still "with it."
The space between questions is there so you don't see the answers until you have made
your own response.
OK, relax, clear your mind, and ....... begin.
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1. What do you put in a toaster?
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The answer is "bread." If you said "toast," then give up now and go do something else.
Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread," go to Question 2.
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2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?
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Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," please do not attempt the next
question. Your brain is obviously over stressed and may even overheat. It may
be that you need to content yourself with reading something more appropriate
such as "Children's World." If you said, "water" then proceed to Question 3.
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3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks
and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks,
what is a greenhouse made from?
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Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks," what the
devil are you still doing here reading these questions????? If you said "glass,"
then go on to Question 4.
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4. Twenty years ago, a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If you will
recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East
Germany. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The pilot, realizing
that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately, the engine fails before he has time, and the plane crashes smack in
the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you
bury the survivors? East Germany or West Germany or in "no man's land?"
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Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else, you
are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash.
Your efforts would not be appreciated. If you said, "Don't bury the survivors,"
then proceed to the next question.
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5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60 of a degree every minute then how many
degrees will the hour hand move in one hour?
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Answer: One degree. If you said "360 degrees" or anything other than "one degree,"
you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you are obviously out of your
league. Turn your pencil in and exit the room. Everyone else proceed to the final
question.
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6. Without using a calculator -- You are driving a bus from London to Milford
Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading, six people get
off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get
on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get in. In Swansea, three people
get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on.
You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?
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Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember? It was YOU, you dummy.
Now pass this a long to all your friends (or enemies) and hope they do better
than you....

Age is a Funny Thing....

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions. How old are you?.... "I'm four and a half" .... You're never 36 and a half .... you're four and a half going on five!
That's the key. You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number. How old are you? "I'm gonna be 16." You could be 12, but you're gonna be 16.
And then the greatest day of your life happens .... you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony .... you BECOME 21 ... YES!!!
But then you turn 30 .... ooohhh what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk .... He TURNED, we had to throw him out. There's no fun now.
What's wrong?? What changed?? You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40 ..... stay over there, it's all slipping away ........
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, you're PUSHING 40, you REACH 50 ..... and your dreams are gone.
Then you MAKE IT to 60 ..... you didn't think you'd make it!!!!
So you BECOME 21, you TURN 30, you're PUSHING 40, you REACH 50, you MAKE IT to 60 ...... then you build up so much speed you HIT 70!
After that, it's a day by day thing. After that, you HIT Wednesday .... You get into your 80's, you HIT lunch. My grandmother won't even buy green bananas .... it's an investment you know, and maybe a bad one.
And it doesn't end there .... into the 90's you start going backwards .... I was JUST 92 ...
Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again .... "I'm 100 and a half!!!!"

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

I Love the 80's!....

I'll tell ya....I hear songs from the 80's (the 80's just makes me soooo LIVELY!)and I just want to move with the music...here's one I was dancin around to like a goofball!! Ha!